Dear Scarlen,

I found that your Literacy Narrative immediately captivated me. Your Literary Narrative is about the impact a book with a topic we still see in current time, which is police brutality, making your Literacy Narrative more intriguing. You began discussing the Novel by Angela Thomas The Hate U Give, giving a summary of the book, most importantly you discuss the main idea of the book in the introduction which I believe is exceptional. In the introduction, the problem I see is there is no thesis statement which can confuse the reader where your Literary Narrative is will be going. Your introduction is great and this problem can be easily fixed.  How you can fix this is by going to paragraphs five-seven where you discuss the impact the novel The Hate U Give had on you. These ideas that were found in the paragraphs which I just mentioned will make it easier to make your thesis statement. Moreover, I decided to give you a tip. You do not need to follow this you can just keep it in mind: you can explain a personal experience this book had on you around the first couple of paragraphs. I see that you have a proper heading, proper page number, a proper centered title (which connects to the main idea in your Literacy Narrative), and proper double spacing showing that you followed the format. I would like you to check page three in the middle section that should be fixed (paragraphing).  You used a good source of introduction technique, using for example signal phrases making it much more clear. There was no syntax found but on page four at the end of paragraph seven should be checked, the second to last sentence should be the concluding sentence. Check a sentence on the second page at the top. A phrase on page three “standing generation” as well should be looked at since I was confused. I advise you to read aloud Literacy Narrative to make sure it sounds clear. Your essay was very intriguing with an interesting topic that will immediately grab the reader’s attention. Overall your Literary Narrative was well written and clear on what was talked about, just some errors that you can easily fix. I enjoyed reading your Literacy Narrative with a topic that is very interesting. I hope this review is helpful for your Literacy Narrative.

 Sincerely,

 Joeli Valerio